Step Eight

Made a list of all people we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. This is one that takes some tine to do and a couple of sharp pencils and a new notebook. When we create the list it can be a very long one and it needs to be. We need to look at everyone we hurt and if they are dead that is of no concern they go on the list ant ways.

This something that we do for our benefit and not the benefit of others. They are not walking around feeling the pain of what we have done, they are living their own lives and hopefully dealing with their own issues. When we talk about amends it is about taking reposibility for our part in the events that happened. How someone else reacted to it is not our concern, only what our part in it was.

The final part of the step is being ready to make amends to them all. That does not mean that we are going to have a party and invite everyone we have ever hurt and make amends to them all at once. Chances are we would not be able to walk out of the room, afterwards. It just means being willing to make amends and being open to the best way to do that. In some cases it may be a phone call or a face to face meeting over a cup of coffee.

For those that have already transitioned to a better place a letter, prayer or song (written by you) may do the job just fine. By being willing we open ourselves to all the possible ways to make the amends. We also open ourselves to the opportunities to come to us to be able to make amends. The person you want to make amends to most and have not seen in many years suddenly calls or walks into your life. By being willing you allow God to do his thing and provide for you the things you need to be able to make amends.

We also also have to be willing to accept that our amends will not be accepted because they are unwilling to let go. That is not on us and solely rests with the person receiving the amends. The final thing that we need to do is to look over the list and look for one name in particular...yours. Is it there? Are you willing to make amends to yourself? Are you willing to accept the amends and forgive yourself for the hurt you caused yourself? If it is not there you really do need to add it.

After all we are very quick to be critical of ourselves and even slower than anyone else to forgive ourselves. Have a great day all and God Bless, I love you all.